Dead Inside

My heart aches
I never thought this love would break
I never thought it to be true
That I would be hurt by you
No words can express my pain
Tears flow whenever I see your name
But I go on as if everything is fine
Although it weighs heavy on my mind
Everything in me says let go
But my heart screams no
And I feel so selfish at times
Because I want a love that is all mine
I want someone to truly love me
Someone that I can call family
I've been so loyal to you
Yet I can't say the same about you too
Like, do you really mean what you say?
Are they just words to get your way?
Are you really there for me?
Can you withstand the insanity?
So many questions run through my mind
Then I remember that you're not mine
Suddenly none of my questions really matter anymore
And I'm left with feelings of being a whore
My heart beats for you
Yet you belong to someone else too
I fell in love with the wrong man
Because you already have a woman
Then I break down all over again
Wishing that I could make it all end
I've never felt this way before
But I'm not strong enough to close the door
So I try to hide it day to day
Although it's getting hard to keep my feelings at bay
And it's during these times that I want to lie down and die
Because I already feel like I'm dead inside